Thursday, March 28, 2013

Emergency Cleaning

It happens all the time. You've just gotten a text saying "Hey, I'll be there in 15 minutes" and your house is a total mess. Here are the super easy steps to get it done QUICKLY. Not perfectly, and you'll definitely have to clean up afterwards, but it'll look nice.

1. Get yourself a laundry basket.

Just take the clothes in it (because you never put laundry away so all your laundry baskets are always full) and dump them on your bed. I don't care about wrinkles, I care about making YOU LOOK GOOD. 

2. Take all your crap and put it in the laundry basket.

The empty coffee mugs on the coffee table, the stacks of junk mail, the 17 pairs of flipflops you have scattered throughout your living space.... just put all of it in the basket. You don't have time to do dishes, and all the cleaning up you have to do after doing this is punishment for the fact that your house is always a mess. It's okay for now. Focus.

3. Put that laundry basket full of crap and shove it in your closet

Now, it doesn't HAVE to be your closet. It could be the bathtub in the master bedroom, hidden in the corner of the guest room, or depending on your lifestyle you could just shove everything in your oven. I don't know your life, but girl you've got no time and a huge to-do list. Be creative here.

4. Spray Febreeze on your pillows.

You really don't have time to do your couch without it still being damp by the time people get there, but since people don't really use pillows, spray it on those. It'll still make the space smell nice without everyone knowing that you're incapable of keeping your house clean.

5. Time to Swiffer

Sweeping takes forever, so just take your dry Swiffer (because I told you to get one, remember?) and get all the places where people are going to be. If your floors have enough big stuff to make a little pile, just push it underneath your couch or armchair. You can clean it up later.

6. Do the 2 minute wipedown of whatever bathroom people are going to be using.

Take all the crap on your counter aside from the soap and maybe your toothbrush and shove all of it in a grocery bag and hide it. Then, take Lysol wipes or just some Windex and quickly wipe down your mirror, sink, and toilet (IN THAT ORDER. DO NOT DO YOUR TOILET FIRST THAT'S SO GROSS). Make sure you have toilet paper. If it's super low, change it out and hide the little extra bit in that big grocery bag.

7. Kitchen, too!?

Yeah, this one sucks. If your dishwasher is empty, count your lucky stars and quickly hide all your crap in there. Depending on how much time you have, you can load it properly. If it's full of dirty dishes, don't bother starting it because it's really loud, so just close it back up and hide everything in your oven (unless you've hidden the rest of your crap in there, in which case I have nothing for you).  Do a super fast wipe down of your counters and make sure you have enough glasses for everyone when they get there.

8. Time to keep your awesome reputation intact.

Whatever emergency snacks you have, (mine are almonds, chips and salsa, baby carrots, plus some frozen cookie dough I can bake if I'm feel ambitious) it's time to get them out and ready. Take out your nice things, and anything you put out will look good. Spray yourself with your favorite perfume, brush your teeth, and put some lipstick on. Run a brush through your hair or just shove it in a fast bun. Put on some earrings.

9. Pour yourself a drink

If you're too exhausted from all your efforts, make yourself some coffee. If you're just frazzled and overwhelmed, get yourself a real drink, like wine. Just make sure you have enough for everyone, because to drink wine in front of others when they can't have any is CRUEL.

YOU DID IT! It's clean! Well..... it's not clean, it's presentable. You'll hate yourself when you realize that your 15 minutes of "cleaning" have left you with, like 45 minutes of real cleaning later. But since no one saw it, it doesn't count. Maybe next time you won't have to rush to do things, but let's face it, the world isn't perfect, and neither are you.


Enjoy!

4 comments:

  1. We may find ourselves using this advice if Lucy's friend comes to play tomorrow. I want to say just throw everything in the laundry basket away, because it proves you have too much stuff. But that's probably the stuff you use regularly. How about this: keep the laundry basket crap and throw everything else away.

    ReplyDelete
  2. you are giving away your secrets, but I guess that is the point!! Do you have to emergency clean for friends? Or is the wine or coffee enough.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Great ideas Katie! But I think Sarah's idea about just getting rid of the crap completely should be noted -- and not just when you are moving and realize how much strange junk you have accumulated.

    Ok -- I won't open anyone's closets!

    ReplyDelete
  4. Haha, I don't have much in terms of useless crap, but I'll do a blog on further de-cluttering sometime soon!

    And Tod, what it's good friends, it's "love me, love my mess". If they're over often enough it's no longer worth all the trouble. A good way to tell it's okay is that if they'll get themselves a glass of water from your kitchen without asking, it's cool to stop a total cleanup.

    ReplyDelete